Sparrow by Emeli Sande

How are you all doing? 

Are you hopeful? Are you angry? Are you scared? Are you impassioned? Are you emboldened? Are you ready to do the work? Are you confused? Are you privileged? Are you paralyzed? Are you asking questions of yourself? Are you worried? Are you crying? Are you listening? Are you grieving? Are you full of love?

I am. I have felt all these emotions and feelings just in the last 2 weeks. Right now, I am also feeling the moment. Like this moment could be the tipping point to change policies in this country, to change mindsets, to change racist belief systems. Tipping points are points that get us in the right direction. Then there is all the work below the iceberg to deeply dismantle.

Don't get me wrong - there was a lot of heartbreak and violence last week. There was also something of a groundswell towards the end where there were small wins throughout the country and global solidarity. People kept protesting and speaking up in different ways. Did you see the 20,000 marching in Los Angeles on Sunday?  I kept watching it over and over - the slow motion of it felt meditative. I also loved hearing about different friends making brave statements about anti-racism on behalf of their organizations. And how some politicans were finally agreeing to reform. And honestly, how so many people were just continuing to do what they do everyday with no need to get on a soapbox because this is their lived experience. No need to pretend.

Artists: Dammit Wesley.Dakotah Aiyanna.Matthew Clayburn.Abel Jackson.Garrison Gist.

Owl & Arko.Kyle Mosher.Franklin Kernes.Kiana Mui.Marcus Kiser.Georgie Nakima.Zach McLean.Frankie Zombie.CHD:WCK!.John Hairston.Dari Calamari

For me:  I realized I needed personal reflection. I became more quiet last week on social media and that felt important to me. It felt more important to reflect, learn and dig into what I truly believe. It felt important to confront how complicit I have been/how I come from privilege, acknowledge how dedicated I am to education for all kids and grieve the pain of racism both personally and for this world. I realized it was important to address both my privilege and the work I have been doing throughout my life around equity and anti-racism in schools.

I love how Ibram X. Kendi so eloquently put it, "For the better part of my life I held both racist and antiracist ideas, supported both racist and antiracist policies; I've been antiracist one moment, racist in many more moments." 

Confrontation, acknowledgement, discernment of self. That's part of the real work. 

A few days ago, I created a statement for myself that I shared with a few loved ones. And I'll share this statement here: 

There is work to be done now. There will be so much work in the future. I am an educator. I am a storyteller. I am a creative. I am a mother. I will use these parts of me to do the work to create a more compassionate, just, and equitable world. That is my commitment to myself, to my family and to humanity.

Sometimes, it feels important to just write it out. To remember what I am trying to do. And to help people call bullshit on me when I'm just couch talking. But to also not get caught up in frenetic energy that is short-lived. 

How are you doing? I wish you all energy and love and passion and belief and pause.  I wish it for myself too. 

I'm featuring another song from Emeli Sande. She really is my prayer so often:

I got wind beneath my wings

I think this time I'm gonna make it 'til morning

I got strength within my heart

I'm gonna sing for all the heroes who've fallen

Yeah, I'm gonna take the long, the long way home

Yes, I'm gonna take the world, the world by storm

We got magic in our bones

Just like the stars, we're gonna shine, bright and golden, ooh

We go bang down all the doors

Make sure we take back all the things that were stolen

Yeah, we're gonna take the long, the long way home yeah

Oh, we're gonna take the world, the world by storm

See, with the heart of a sparrow

Oh, tell me what arrow could ever bring you down, mmm, yeah

Oh, the escape, it was narrow

But what a gift, the, the courage you found, mmm

See, with the heart of a sparrow

Oh, tell me what arrow could ever bring you down

Oh, the escape, it was narrow

But, but what gift, the courage you found, yeah

I got stars within my soul 

I think the dust is gonna finally settle, but hurry

Pure as rivers, strong as mountains

We spread love like the flowers give petals

Oh, we're gonna take the long, the long way home

Oh, we're gonna take the world, the world by storm, yeah

We're gonna take, take the long way home, that's right

Then we're gonna take the world, the world by storm

Yes, we're gonna take the whole wide world by storm